OK, this may seem like the weirdest/dumbest question of all time, but is it ok to put things like fruit or chocolate in my vagina? I’ve played around with it before. But are there like guidelines? Would fruit have pesticides? What is safe for me to put in my vagina? I don’t even know who to ask.
The good news is that there are no dumb questions!
In fact, any A&E nurse will tell you people put all sorts of things inside themselves, without first considering if they’re safe, so this is actually a great question.
Admittedly, the main reason peeps find themselves at A&E is because they’ve lost something up their bum, as toys, fruit and household implements can get lost up there and cause harm, if not, ahem, ‘extracted’.
Using items from the fresh produce aisle vaginally won’t necessitate any pink-cheeked trips to hospital but you are right to be cautious about pesticides and chemicals.
You can remove the chemicals and pesticides that are so freely sprayed over our fresh food these days by soaking in a vinegar solution (10% vinegar/ 90% water) and then rinsing again in fresh water.
It’s never a good idea to risk disrupting the delicate PH balance of your vagina and whilst rinsing is likely to remove all vinegar residue, fruit & veg have their own inherent alkaline and acidity levels, so there is a safer and easier option to ensure your lady garden blossoms rather than wilts, with culinary attention.
Fruit and vegetables are probably the first sex toys known to women and certainly the smooth, cool shape of a cucumber has caught many a women’s eye, so we’d say cover with a condom and go for it!
Food as ‘foreplay’ is clearly a brilliant love triangle of mouths, taste and sex (who can forget the 9 1/2 weeks food scene) and we carry a whole range of edible delights such as body paint, massage oils and even candy nipple tassels to satisfy this.
Body paint, barring any allergies (they are likely to be made in factories that also work with nuts, so best avoided if you’re sensitive to this allergy) is safe for use on external areas, especially if it’s going to be licked off quickly (though not too quickly- eh!?) rather than be allowed to linger.
But you’re right that you have to be a bit more careful when it comes to what you put in your vagina.
Acidity in some foods can also be a problem and cause irritation. And it’s a bad idea to using anything spreadable because it might be hard to remove… When you start looking into it it seems like food may not be the safest thing to put in your vagina after all.
There are issues around putting anything sugary inside your vagina because sugar, including natural fruit sugars, can upset the natural balance and help create an environment where yeast infections such as thrush can spring to life.
We guess the best, most simple advice is to differentiate what goes on your body and what goes in.
Body paint, whipped cream, honey or whatever you fancy can make for some sensational fun, but be cautious about putting anything on the delicate skin on your vulva and clitoris.
Anything going inside, either cover with a condom or stick to sex toys made of non-porous, body safe materials, such as silicone and ABS plastic, glass or metal (check out or advice about using sex toys safely too).
Thanks for the thought provoking question. If anyone has any questions about sex and relationships please contact us at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Hope that helps!
Best Wishes, Team Sh!