Guys have their own erotic pleasure spot called the prostate – a gland that is comparable to the female G-Spot. This spot is often referred to as the ‘male G-spot’ – although we like to call it P-spot, as this better refers to the prostate.
Gone are the days when playing with his bum was taboo – these days it’s widely acknowledged that the entire anal area is one big pleasure zone.
And for men, the orgasmic rewards of prostate play are apparently mind-blowing. They describe it a totally different sensation, and often report their orgasm to be much more intense than the solely penis-inspired kind. Some men need / enjoy their front bits stimulating too whilst others can get off just with prostate massage.
It can be very tricky for a man to stimulate his own P-spot internally, and partners may have short fingers – leaving only one solution: get a prostate massager.
But, before you go in swinging, remember that rectal tissue is very delicate and does not self-lubricate.
Lots of lube and lots of foreplay is essential to pleasurable prostate massage.
Make sure your partner is properly turned on before going anywhere near his bum. There’s a widely-accepted believe that anal sex essentially hurts, but this simply isn’t the case. Not using lube will hurt. Going too fast and not giving anal muscles time to relax into the sensations will hurt. Not letting your partner be fully in charge of the pace will make him tense up and that may hurt too. But, by following our advice on first time anal play, you’ll both be prepared and his body will be ready to accept pleasurable prostate play.
How to use a Prostate Massager
Prostate massagers have been designed to reach in and connect with the P-spot.
Keep stimulating his front parts (shaft and party bag) whilst slowly inserting the prostate massager. Go gently; a slow pace and communication is key.
Prostate massagers have a curve, which needs to be inserted very gently. A good trick is to point the curved tip towards his belly button (on the inside). This means that if he is laying on his back, you insert the prostate massager in a gently upwards curve, but if your man is on all fours, you’ll want to point it downwards…
This will ensure you follow the natural curve of the anal canal, thus eliminating any accidental pain.
Rock the massager gently back and forth – this will stimulate his P-spot. The prostate will swell and harden, and become more receptive to firmer stimulation.
If the massager offers vibration, this is the time to turn the buzz on. Start off gently – the bum is very sensitive so vibration will feel far more intense in his tush, compared to how it feels in your hand. At the point of orgasm, your man will likely feel that he’s climaxing from both ends – explosive!
Top 3 most popular prostate massagers, as chosen by male customers:
Naughty Boy by British toy designers Rocks Off is our most popular prostate massager. Slimmest out of the prostate toy collection, the tip isn’t much wider than a finger. Suitable for newbies, Naughty Boy gently increases in girth, offering a slightly fuller feeling when it’s in place. The flatter part sits comfortably in the “taint” – the area between the balls and the anus. Naughty Boy comes with an upgraded 7-speed version of the popular RO-Bullet, meaning you have several speeds and patterns to experiment with.
The Njoy Fun Wand is a heavy stainless steel massager with a long handle for easy use. You have the option of using either end, making this prostate toy very versatile. Weighty toys are incredibly sexy and usually work very well for both P-spots and G-spots and because Fun Wand is made from high-grade steel, it can be sterilized.
Use the slimmer end with three bulbs for warm-up and teasing – the opening and closing of the sphincter muscle feels so good – and try the larger bulb when you feel ready for more.
Lelo Bob is a non-vibrating prostate massager. Super-stylish and so smooth in silicone, Lelo Bob has a strong curve to ensure a full feeling and accurate P-spot pleasure. Lelo Bob is for the more advanced player; the girth can be a little intimidating if you are new to anal play.
When massaging the prostate with a toy, explore different sensations
You can slowly and gently twist the toy around, or try a rocking back and forth motion, or why not give a gently sliding in and out motion a go? Let the partner on the receiving end dictate the pace – it’s their bum, after all!
Learn More about Prostate Pleasure
The Ultimate Guide to Prostate Pleasure, is THE go-to guide on learning all about the incredible orgasmic potential of this very special male pleasure spot, with advice on massage, pegging, positions, toys, building trust, communicating desires, plus illustrated tips and techniques about achieving supercharged orgasms…
Shiver me timbers! An anal vibrator will deliver waves of trembly delight to an area that is jam-packed with super-sensitive nerve endings. As sensations feel so magnified in this incredibly responsive area, the buzz of the vibrator thrills the whole pelvic area.
Using a vibrator anally can help relax tense anal muscles and prepare the body for bigger things to come, so they can be a good way to fire up arousal for anal sex with a partner.
They are also a fun way to explore new sensations, all on their own.
This is why, when choosing avibrator for anal play, it’s important that it is shaped so that it is impossible for it to buzz its way out of your hand and get sucked inside.
When vibration, lubricant and a relaxed bum are involved, this can happen all too easily and a toy lost inside is dangerous, as it can work itself up the body.
Sometimes we feel like a stuck-record on the subject of anal sex toy safety, especially when lots of other companies ignore it completely, recommending anal toys and vibrators with no guards or insufficient bases/handles.
We guess they haven’t taken a tearful, panicky phone call from someone with an anal toy lost up his bum (not one of ours, we hasten to add!) needing urgent advice.
Apart from having the essential anal-safe shape, any toy destined for your bum must be smooth and seamless in order not to nick delicate rectal skin. And it should be easy to clean.
Rest assured, we don’t carry any toys with rough seams, sharp ends, unsturdy elements that might break in use, nor anything we think is difficult or impossible to keep clean, so this advise is just in case you’re buying elsewhere…
How to use an anal vibrator
All anal pleasureis best enjoyed as a slow journey of arousal. There are few peeps, outside of porn films, that can enjoy anal ‘quickies’ This goes for playing with an anal vibrator, so take your time and savour each sensual thrill…
There are essentially 4 different types of anal vibrators – each delivering a different type of sensation, along with vibration;
It is okay to use a regular vibrator just as long as the design means it’s safe for anal play too – if you would like any advice on this email us! ( please dont just buy and hope for the best!)
A rabbit-style vibrator with an external clitoral stimulator, which will act as a guard. You can also hook your finger around the clitoral stimulator for an extra-secure grip. A benefit too is the external /clitoral stimulator can be used to tickle the perineum – this strip of sensitive skin is an often over-looked erroneous zone but it’s actually rich in nerve endings.
Many G-Spot vibrators can used for anal play too and they can be a great shape for prostate massage. Make sure you choose one with a properly flared base ( often designed for added clitoral stimulation) and long enough handle on which to keep a tight grip.
A final word. Dont use a vibrator that has been used anally, for subsequent vaginal play unless it has been covered in a condom ( the best/safest option) or properly santitized between times.
As it is non-porous, Silicone is really the only vibrator material that can be sterilized.
Men have their own erotic pleasure spot, called the Prostate – a gland that is comparable to the female G-Spot
…which is why it is sometimes referred to as the male G-spot.
Erotic prostate massage is highly pleasurable for lots men. Their orgasms are often more explosive when prostate stimulation is combined with sex. Some lucky chaps can orgasm through erotic prostate massage alone!
How to find and stimulate your man’s erotic hot spot – The Prostate Gland.
Massage the male G-spot /prostate by inserting a finger covered in anal lube or special prostate massager two to three inches into his anus and stroking towards the front of his body using a ‘come here’ gesturing motion, exactly like a G-Spot stroke.
Exactly like the female G-Spot, the prostate swells and hardens as it becomes aroused, making it easier to feel.
The more turned-on your man, the more his prostate will be receptive firmer stimulation.
If you are going to add erotic prostate / male G-Spot massage to your repertoire, you’ll need to understand how sensitive & slowly the journey to prostate pleasure should be.
Inside the anus are two sets of sphincter muscles; the first can be tensed at will, but the second set constrict involuntarily.
So even he wants erotic prostate / male G-Spot massage and is trying to relax, his anus might initially appear to resist.
If it does, you are taking things too quickly or not using enough lubricant.
Patience and a slow, teasing pace are essential to relaxing anal muscles and enjoying anal sex / anal sex toys.
Inside the anus are two sets of sphincter muscles; the first can be tensed at will, whilst the second constricts involuntarily.
This is why, even if you are trying to relax into the delights of anal pleasure, your body might resist. This is when anal sex can hurt and forcing the issue will only result in the muscles resisting further!
Only by taking as much time as the body needs to open up to anal pleasure, and by using plenty of lube, will delicate tushies be kept safe, happy and relaxed enough to enjoy anal sex/toys to the full.
All toys destined for anal play need to be ‘anal-safe‘
There’s 3 things to check for before introducing your tush to a sex toy
Anal -Safe Design. Just as – ahem – it’s an exit from the body, it can also be an entrance. Putting it bluntly, toys can get lost up there. So, make sure your anal sex toy has either:
a wide or flared base, which as a ‘stop’ no matter how excited you get
a long handle that you are sure you can keep a firm grip upon – (keep it and your fingers free of lube)
a ring in which to slip your finger and hold tight!
2. Smooth, Non-Porous Surface: Your bum is a delicate flower with thin, ‘nickable’ skin ( much more so that the vajay) so any sex toy for anal play needs to be smooth and seamless. For peace of mind, it should also be non-porous, so it can easily be cleaned/sterilized.
3. Flexible enough to bend with the natural curves of the anus. Around 4 inches inside, the anal canal bends, so any toy longer than this should be flexible, in order not to ‘bump’ and feel uncomfortable.
Anal Sex Toy Materials
Silicone: We believe this is the very best material for anal sex toys as it’s sensually smooth, soft, flexible, non-porous and super easy to keep clean. If the toy is non-vibrating, or contains a removable bullet, you can even sterilize it. Use water-based lube with silicone toys as silicone lube, over time, can start to degrade the smooth surface of your toy.
Glass:Smooth , cool and firm, glass delivers sensually sleek sensations like no other sex toy material. You can use any type of lubricant with glass and a little goes a long way. Glass toys can be warmed by running under that hot tap before you play. Can be sterilized.
Steel: Very similar to glass but has an added weightiness that can feel sensational anally. The weight also makes for incredible prostate massage.
All these materials are body-safe, which means they wont disclose any substances ( is chemicals) into you body as well as non-porous which means they won’t absorb anything from your body either.
Hygiene is clearly an important factor when we’re talking bum-fun, which is why the best anal sex toys are non-porous toys that you can clean/ sterilize thoroughly. Condoms can be used on any toys and make for quick, easy peace-of-mind clean up.
So, safety message over.
Now let’s take off into the wonderful world of anal sex toys.
There are essentially 5 types of anal sex toys
Understanding the different sensations delivered by different anal toys is key to choosing the right anal toy for you.
Each provide a very different kind of anal pleasure.
Choosing your first anal toy can be mind-boggling and intimidating, especially if you’re going in blind, so here we’ll briefly describe the different sensations they deliver.
A Butt Plug is a stay-put anal sex toy, designed to be ‘worn’.
The narrow neck of a butt-plug prompts sphincter muscles to squeeze around where it’s slimmest, thus holding it in place.
Butt plugs are not designed to be moved in-and-out, but eased inside where they stay put ( thou they will often need a hand to keep them in place as it’s the body’s natural reflex to ‘expel’ from this area! ) providing a pleasurable feeling of fullness and pressure.
Butt plugs are available in both vibrating and non-vibrating options, from the tiny-sized and up.
A dildo is best for a sliding-in-and-out feeling or for anal sex with a strap-on, whether with your female partner or ‘pegging’ your male partner.
Whether worn in a harness or used hand-held, a dildo ( rather than a butt-plug) is best for delivering smooth, penetrative sensations as there’s no sphincter-stop for the anal muscles to close in around.
In our anal dildo section, we list our most popular dildos bought at our store specifically for anal pleasure but feel free to choose any Sh! silicone dildo – their wide bases make every one totally safe for anal play.
The shape of an anal vibrator will give you a clue as to the kind of pleasure it will deliver; stay-put plug; ‘popping’ beads; in-and-out penetration; specific prostate massage but it will also vibrate.
The sensation of vibration around the super sensitive anal area can feel mind-blowingly intense. Plus the vibrations themselves can distract your body away any reflexes of resistance, ie the buzz physically helps relax tense anal muscles.
Essentially a cock-ring, designed for a man to wear on his penis, with the clitoral stimulator buzzing away on his female partner’s clit (in missionary and woman-on-top positions) whilst the lower dildo provides her with anal/double penetration.
It can be used in the same way, slipped onto a dildo during strap-on sex, too.
Lube is essential for all anal sex, including toys.
The anus doesn’t self-lubricate and naturally resists if stimulation doesn’t feel smooth and ‘resistance-free’.
Adding lube ensures that everything is kept super-sensual and deliciously slippery.
Anal lubricant is thicker and lasts longer than regular lube, which is why it is recommended for the gentle art of sensual anal pleasuring.
Remember, whichever toy you go for, put a generous dollop of lubricant on the tip of your toy and the anal area before you play, wiping any excess off handle/base to ensure it’s not too slippery to keep a firm hold on.
Sensual, pain-free anal sex is all about being super-relaxed.
If worrying about ‘you-know-what’ ( yes- we’re talking poo) will just make you tense, then starting your anal adventure in the shower is a good place to ensure you feel fresh and relaxed.
And whilst it’s by no way essential and is not an anal sex toy in the true sense (though it can feel very pleasurable) a douchewill give you extra confidence about being super-clean for your anal play.
Latex gloves turn hands and fingers into smooth operators.
Plus, they sound sexy when snapped on suggestively and are perfect for medical fantasy role-play.
Analingus or ‘rimming’ is using your tongue to pleasure the anal area.
A dam can be used to cover the anal area so you can probe and lick away without a care in the world.
Both participants can worry about not always being fresh as a daisy ‘down there’.
This is understandable, given the hang-ups and insecurities many of us have been given around this subject,
But worrying isn’t conducive to hot sex, just as rushing off to shower isn’t conducive to spontaneous sex. A dam is simply a cheap, easy and tasty (they come in different flavours) way to enjoy relaxed impulsive rimming.