Guy’s Guide to Female Pleasure

Guy’s Guide to Female Pleasure

Introducing our new class!

For the first time  ever, we are opening up our famous erotic classes to the fellas!

In a new men-only class, attendees will be taken on a guided tour of pleasurable peaks and orgasmic delights of women’s sexuality, covering  female anatomy & arousal,  tips & tricks on how to locate the G-spot, how to choose and use the right sex toys to enhance her pleasure and also what to expect (or not) from female ejaculation.

Most men learn about the ins-and-outs of pleasure by watching porn, and this can lead to all sorts of issues in the bedroom. We have been teaching informative and fun classes for women & couples for many years, and one request kept popping up:  our female customers wanted a class they can send male partners to. By attending one of our guy’s classes in December, you can really give her the gift that keeps giving this Christmas: PLEASURE!

This is the sex education everyone wishes they’d received at school.


Our Top 5 Pleasure Tips for Men:

  • All women are created equal but sexual responses are individual and unique.
  • Always approach a new partner with an open mind, giving heart and warm hands.
  • Pay attention to her responses; every sigh and wiggle is telling you something.
  • The tiny tip of the clitoris has around 8000 nerve-endings sitting atop it – this means she is hyper-sensitive so be gentle (for comparison: the glans of a man’s penis has 4000 nerve-endings).
  • Think of the clitoris as a clock-face with 12 at the top and 6 at the bottom. Every woman has her very own, personal ‘Happy Hour’ – a clitoral pleasure time that makes her tick every time…


The *fully clothed* classes will be held at  at 57 Hoxton Square N1 6PB, and guests will be invited to make the most of an exclusive 20% discount.

5th December, 6.30pm  (£35)

19th December, 6.30pm  (£35)



Don’t be A Dick!

Don’t be A Dick!

As sexuality educators, we spend our days talking about sex & sexuality and there really is very little that has the potential to embarrass or shock us. Body fluids, kinks and fetishes come up on a daily basis and we don’t bat an eyelid. But during a recent workshop in our Hoxton store, we encountered something that left us lost for words.

We always start off our popular erotic classes with a short ice breaker, a fun way of getting guests relaxed and ready for whatever the evening may bring. The class in question was our Blow His Mind class, and after having assigned each guest their “penis-name” we asked why they’d decided to come along to a class on fellatio.

As one lovely guest bravely shared her reason, our jaws dropped open. She told us she’d only ever given one blow job in her entire life – which wasn’t the reason for our stunned silence, by the way. Many people choose to not give blow jobs, nothing new there. No, what had our knickers all bunched up was the comment she’d received from her lover afterwards: he’d said that the blow job was “shit.”

Naturally this raised a discussion in the Sh! camp after class, and we are all in agreement: the condescending comment says more about the man receiving the blow job than it does about the woman performing it.

For the sake of fairness, we’ll add that damaging comments can as easily come from the mouths of a women. Negative attitudes aren’t gendered, after all. But we digress, this particular piece is about men and blow jobs.

Dudes – if someone does you the honour of taking your penis into their mouth, you need to be respectful.

First Time Nerves

The fact that two people like each other well enough to want to get naked together does little to settle first-time nerves; heading into uncharted territory is always scary. Taking a penis into your mouth for the first time is scary: it feels big, it’s warm and it smells & tastes unfamiliar. Never mind that firm hand you may have on the back of your head, pushing your inexperienced mouth further down on a proud erection – not helpful, guys.

At this point, gentle encouragement is much appreciated. Consider the possibility that this person has never been up close and personal with a peen before – they have dived in head first, as it were. It’s your job to help them swim.


Communication is on anyone and everyone who gets into a consensual sexual situation with another person. A nudge in the right direction, a soft “I like it there” will ensure you both get what you want from the encounter: mutual pleasure. You may want it slower, or harder, or lots of tongue in a certain spot – so ask for it… Don’t assume that the person working on your pleasure is a mind-reader.

Dissing someone for being rubbish in bed is unlikely to make them want to see you again, let alone have sex with you. Shaming someone for having the balls (pun intended) to try something new is never ok. Perhaps they are from a culture where sex is not discussed, perhaps they have never seen a naked body before… Hard-earned sexual empowerment and confidence will be shattered in mere seconds.

Telling someone they are ‘shit’ in bed does not make you a great lover, it makes you a dick. Don’t be a dick.

Many men assume that deep throating, the act of taking a penis as deep into the mouth and throat as possible, is a given. It is not.

Deep throating is not for everyone and certainly not for someone who have never performed fellatio before. It’s advanced-level, and just because it looks easy in porn doesn’t mean it is as easy in reality. Deep throating is about intimacy and trust, and if you don’t do your darnedest to create a safe atmosphere in which your partner feels supported enough to try it, you don’t deserve it.

Taking Responsibility for Your Orgasms

Going back to the guest at our class, we bet the encounter wasn’t great for her either, yet the male partner wouldn’t assume it’s because he is “shit” in bed. It is easier to point fingers at others than it is to take responsibility for ones own actions. He deemed her sexually inadequate, when in fact all she needed was encouragement and a few handy hints about his likes. Instead, he chose to undermine her confidence by not taking responsibility for his own pleasure.

It is not another person’s job to “give” you earth-shattering orgasms – you are in charge of your own satisfaction. If you don’t know how to have an orgasm, it would be hugely unfair to expect someone else to just make it happen.

Great sex is much like anything else, it requires practice and patience.

Top Tips for Being a Great Lover

  • Take your time
  • Be encouraging
  • Listen actively
  • Communicate clearly
  • Pay attention to body language
  • Have basic knowledge of anatomy and hot spots

We hope our guest goes on to have a loving, fulfilling sex life with someone who deserves her time and attention, once her confidence has been restored – we are here to cheer her on!

Love, Team Sh! xx




Teenage Boys & Sex

Brook, Teenage Boys & Sex

“You’ll see me, I have an orange plastic bag on my head”

The lovely Tahnee of Brook had us in fits of giggles even before the working day had started. The rain was pouring down and it was quiet.

Those of you familiar with Sh! will know that teenage boys aren’t exactly our target market. In fact, our experience of this sometimes tiresome group is mainly over the phone, when they do their best to out-do each other by making “funny” phone calls during school holidays (“How is your glory hole today, madam?”). And then there was that one time when one boy managed to sneak in and we found him in front of a painting of a naked woman, reverently stroking her muff with one hand whilst eating chips with the other… You can see why we were feeling apprehensive.

Following Tahnee to the back of a work shop on an easily-missed side street, we saw a greenhouse (which turned out to be the venue), a small sandwich shop and a row of festival-like toilets with non-lockable doors (and an opened bottle of baby oil). None of these did much to reassure us.

But we needn’t have worried.

Once the group of lads, aged between 16-23, tumbled in, we realized it was going to be just fine. Well-behaved, polite and genuinely interested in the topic of female anatomy, sexuality & orgasms. Phew!

Keen to break the ice and get everyone comfortable, we charged ahead and asked their names, and their preferred words for male & female genitalia, and penetrative sex. Dick, pussy and sex were the main ones (no surprise), but the word “beat” threw us a little. “Beat” is (apparently) East London slang for sex. We image a conversation would go something like this:

“Whatcha doin’ tonite, bro?

“I’m gonna beat my girl, innit.”

“Cool bro – enjoy!”

The mind boggles.

Vulva PuppetBefore bringing out our secret weapon, a plush vulva called Rosie, we asked how many of the guys watch porn on regularly. Hands rose tentatively, but it’s fair to say the answer was “all of them”. And herein lies a big part of the problem. Youngsters receive very poor sex education in schools; mainly about reproduction, and little to no info on STI’s, pleasure, masturbation and consent. Instead, they learn mostly from watching porn. Which isn’t great. Where are the condoms? Where is the lube? Where is the *genuine* pleasure?

One of the guys asked how to make women experience multiple orgasms, and we think he was both a little disappointed and a little relived when we explained that most of the multiple orgasms he sees on the screen are faked.

Not learning about ‘real’ sex puts a huge amount of pressure on teenagers. On the guys; to be well-hung stallions that can keep the man-sausage up for hours on end; and on the girls to wax themselves bare, have orgasm after orgasm, and squirt on command.

It is so easy to buy into the finished package, especially if it’s glossy and well produced. It’s a bit like an adult version of Disney – make believe. Enjoy watching it, but remember that the dancing, talking mice aren’t real.


We started off with a show & tell of basic female anatomy, using the plush vulva and some print-outs. We talked about the 8000 nerve-endings that sits atop the clitoris and how to stimulate them in ways that are pleasurable rather than painful (it’s not a door bell, guys – no need to ring it!).

The guys felt, smelled and tasted their way through a selection of water-based lubes, and giggled at the flavoured ones. We were delighted to see that they were keen on the lube, and a loud cheer went up when they saw that we’d brought along freebie samples for them.

We looked at small but effective toys for the clitoris, and toys for the G-spot. The plush vulva comes complete with a G-spot of her own, so the group had a go at locating and stroking it with expressions of deep concentration on their faces.

Mothers of teen boys; stock up on Tenga Eggs for your lads!

We discussed male anatomy as well, the glans, shaft, prostate and party bags (scrotum is such an unsexy word). That some men have only one testicle rather than two came as a surprise, as did the fact that circumcised men have less sensitivity and so need more stimulation in order to get off.

Tenga Egg (£10) make fun, cool gifts for men

At this point we brought out the Tenga Egg and bright pink dildo we’d brought along to show how much fun toys for boys can be.

Tenga Eggs are, in our opinion, the best toy for guys EVER. All men should have one. (Or two!) The lads took turns testing it out on the pink dildo. Tenga eggs are amazing toys, whether a guy is single or in a relationship, and we dare say the lads will be making a few purchases *wink*.

We eventually worked our way to the back, as it were, and brought up anal sex. At which point they all fell silent and round-eyed.

Porn rarely show the use of condoms and lube, never mind what to do if things get unexpectedly messy – which can happen. We don’t know if this is something teenage boys are concerned about, but we certainly have many customers who bring it up. We talked about enema bulbs, and easy clean-up by using condoms which can just be thrown away.

Stressing the fact that a long-lasting lube should always be used (no, spit really won’t do) and that it’s essential to start small and take plenty of time to warm up the person on the receiving end – this may take several play sessions. A wham-bam-thank-you-mam can be painful and put someone off anal sex for life. When done right anal play should be pleasurable. To ensure comfortable play, it’s a good idea for the receiver to be in charge of depth and speed.

And never, ever pretend to slip in the wrong entrance ‘by mistake’. Not cool.

One of the guys admitted to having tried this technique, and agreed it wasn’t the best way…

Dental DamsWe broke open a dental dam for the guys to look at, and it turned out that only one of them had heard of dams before (shame on you, school sex ed!). Dams are latex sheets that are placed over vulva or anus before oral sex, and it creates a safer sex barrier between giver and receiver.  One of the lads tasted the dam (he correctly guessed strawberry flavour), and thus won himself a whole heap of man-points from the rest of the group.

Many thanks to Brook, the young people’s sexual health & wellbeing charity, for giving us the opportunity to come along to their new project  @ComeTruPleasure. We had such a great day!


header-logo-brookBrook’s vision is of a society that values all children, young people and their developing sexuality. We want all children and young people to be supported to develop the self-confidence, skills and understanding they need to enjoy and take responsibility for their sexual lives, sexual health and emotional well-being.

Brook provides free and confidential sexual health and wellbeing services for nearly 250,000 young people UK-wide, each year.

National Orgasm Day

Our Top 10 Orgasmic Sex Toys for National Orgasm Day

Would you be surprised if we told you that National Orgasm Day on 31st of July is our favourite day of the year? Probably not! Of course orgasms are good for you and we think they should be enjoyed as often as possible, and as many as you can manage to eek out in each session, but having a whole day dedicated to the marvellously pleasurable contractions that are orgasms – yes, count us in!

Orgasms can be brought on by all manner of things: fingers, pillows, partners, nipple stimulation (it’s true) and reliable power-showers to mention just a few, but millions of women (and men, it should be said) have their best and strongest orgasms with a trusted vibrator.

And for such a day, it’s only apt that we share our Top 10 Sex Toys for orgasms!

Ruby Glow

Ruby Glow is a fantastically inventive ride-on toy – you needn’t even use your hands! Simple slide it under you whilst sitting at your desk, for example, and rock against the clitoral mound. This works really well if you want to have your hands free for reading, sexy chat or just getting on with work…

Having won itself the mightily impressive place of 2nd Best Sex Toy in a recent vote by Good Housekeeping Magazine, we can only agree! Ruby Glow also featured on This Morning with Phil & Holly, and silver fox Phil was more than a little curious about this fun vibe that got GHK’s seal of approval.




Lelo Ina WaveLelo Ina Wave

Lelo are industry leaders for good reason – they take time to create toys that are as visually stimulating as they are clit & G-spot pleasing. Lelo Ina Wave is the ultimate in Dual Pleasure style vibes; the curvaceous clit-stim reaches over and buzzes against the clitoris, whilst the cleverly designed internal shaft waves in “come hither”-motions against the G-spot. All you need to do is lie back and relax whilst Lelo Ina Wave does the rest! Now, please excuse us whilst we pass out with pleasure…





Lily Remote Control ToyLily Remote Control Bullet £34

Whilst the vibrating bullet may resemble a buzzing tampon, it is incredibly thrilling to pop the discreet vibe in place – in your knickers, or inside you – and set off out for a fun afternoon in the sunshine. Hand over the remote control to a partner for extra spicy fun. Ordering ice cream whilst trying not to cross your eyes with pleasure is more difficult than it sounds, trust us!

A less intense way of using this little lovely, is to slip the small bullet into the pocket in the gusset of your panties. And – we should probably let you know that many remote controlled toys work on the same frequency, so you may find that women around you start wriggling when you press that on/off button…





We-Vibe 4We Vibe 4+ Couples Vibrator

We Vibe 4+ is the fourth generation of the bestselling couples vibrator.  The small pad slides in and against her G-spot whilst the larger parts sits snugly against labia and clitoris. All this – and he can slide in too! Enjoy the vibrations together in your favourite position – taking penetrative sex to the next level. And, did we mention it comes with a remote control for handy increasing of intensity at crucial moments? A constant bestseller in our  shop in Hoxton, We Vibe + gets both thumbs up from Team Sh!







Sh! Strap-On KitsBest Strap-On Kit (£99) All our best-selling strap on goodies, in a perfectly put-together kit

The best in the business, our strap-ons have helped many a couple towards that climactic peak of pleasure. Our silicone dildos come in a  wide range of colours, shapes and sizes (as do our harnesses), and you can even get dildos with built-in vibration – bonus! The vibration carries through the silicone and can be felt through the shaft, and also through the signature heart shaped base that sits over the pubic area when wearing the strap-on.

Sh! Strap-Ons are handmade in our studio right here in London, and if you look after your harness & dildo kit well, it will last you for years and years. (That’s a whole lotta pleasure!)




Fun Factory Stronic Drei

The name is more complicated than it needs to be, granted, but there is nothing else about this toy we don’t adore.

The Stronic Drei (meaning three in German, as the third in this exciting line) has cleverly designed magnets inside its silicone-coated, metal shaft which cause it to thrust, jiggle and pulsate, imitating the feeling of penetration.

Designed and built by Fun Factory in Germany, this vibe comes with an uber-sturdy motor and also the very latest in recharge technology. What’s not to love?





Oh sweet Lord – who designed this wonderful gem? Give him or her an orgasm award, quick! The Womanizer couples gentle vibrations with sucking (yes, sucking!) of the clitoris for an intense and mind-blowing climax that’ll wash over you within a few minutes.

The company behind Womanizer told tall tales (we thought) of how every woman who had tested them had reached orgasm. Bah humbug, we said. Until we tried it for ourselves. Now we can believe it!

Womanizer may be a little intense if you have a super-sensitive clitoris. For this, we recommend to wear out some of the charge – you may find the sensations only get better (and better) as the toy gets weaker. You can also win one in our National Orgasm Day Flash Competition.






Je Joue Her Name is Rioooh-by-je-joue-her-name-is-rio-pleasure-kit-packaging

A super-cute orgasm-kit suitable for travelling, Rio has three components: a small motor, a top for clitoral pleasure and a shaft for G-spot stimulation – just chop & change as you please!

Pop the motor in the chosen top, then lie back and let dreams of sandy beaches in faraway places take you away… Rio pleasure set is fully waterproof and rechargeable, making it a versatile vibe for fun any time the mood strikes. This luxury pic&mix kit gets our vote every time!

Of course, to ensure a wholly orgasmic experience, a good lube should always be on stand by. We recommend water-based lubes as they are body-friendly and are suitable for use with any and all toys.



Let’s not leave the boys out – everyone can join in the celebrations for National Orgasm Day party!

Men’s sex toys are often rather unattractive affairs with open lips, bums or fake boobs (why??). We think that men too, can and should enjoy sexy toys in body-friendly materials and we stock carefully selected toys for men both on our website and in our shop. We have two great options here:


Tenga Eggs Masturbation Cups

Tenga Egg (£10) make fun, cool gifts for menWe love Tenga Eggs – these are the most clever toys for the man in  your life! Simply unwrap the Kinder Egg-like shape, drizzle the accompanying water-based lube into the stretchy top, slip over the head of the penis, and slide up & down… Easy!






Rocks Off  O’Boy Prostate MassagerRocks Off O-Boy

Prostate massagers are becoming increasingly popular and this slim version from British toy designers Rocks Off is a great starter massager.

Make sure to lube it up before sliding into place, and once the vibrations has been switched on, he’ll be begging for more…

Men’s Health Week: Guest Blog from Pleasure Solutions on Sex After Prostate Cancer

Men’s Health Week: Guest Blog from Pleasure Solutions on Sex After Prostate Cancer

Prostate cancer can have a devastating effect not just on men’s health but also on their sex lives. People often forget the importance of sexual function in the lives of cancer survivors, male and female and the severe impact this can have on quality of life, self esteem and intimacy.

This week is Men’s Health Week so we asked Hilary Belcher of Pleasure Solutions to talk to us about some of the sexual consequences of prostate cancer and treatment.


“We believe everyone living beyond cancer has the right to return to a quality of sex life they’re satisfied with.”

To achieve an erection, a man needs to have healthy nerves to transmit pleasure messages, veins that can transport the blood that fills the penis to make it hard, vital tissues in the penile muscles that keep the erectile response and the desire to have sex which is a process involving both the brain and penis.

Prostate cancer and treatment can affect each of these necessary functions.  Pelvic Radiotherapy can cause cell and tissue deterioration, including damage to nerves and veins that are required to flood the penis with blood to create the hardness. Similarly non-nerve sparring surgery to remove the prostate gland can damage the nerves that relay pleasure message for sexual function.  Finally many men are required to take androgen deprivation treatment resulting in reduced production of testosterone and therefore impeding normal erectile function.

Statistics show that 60-80% of men recovering from Prostate Cancer still have erectile dysfunction (ED) even 2 years after finishing treatment.


These messages around erectile dysfunction and prostate cancer are important for men to understand fully before they enter treatment.  Many clinicians report that in the early stages of diagnosis the focus is on survival and messages about erectile dysfunction get lost.  It is only after treatment that the late effects of the treatment become important.  If men realised these long-term impacts earlier then they could take steps to rehabilitate their penis to keep its vitality and increase their chances of maintaining erectile function as a result.  In the stark but real words of Prostate UK charity “use it or loose it”.


Despite these disturbing statistics and the realities faced by many there are solutions available for men recovering from cancer and its treatment. Pleasure Solutions is a company that provides advice, information and scientifically designed products to help people respond to life-altering changes to their sex lives.

There are several products that can be helpful for men suffering from the after effects of prostate cancer treatments.

One of these is the innovative TENGA egg  uses a super-stretchable material that can be used on a non-erect penis.  Using an egg regularly will keep blood flowing into the tissues of the penis – te-loverskeeping it strong, healthy and less likely to shrink in size.

The hope is that individuals or couples using these TENGA eggs will maintain intimacy during a difficult time and even if an erection is not achieved the pleasure provided by these tools could lead to an orgasm.  It is important to demystify the association that a man needs an erection to climax.

Therefore, the diagnosis of prostate cancer does not need to mean the likely loss of erections. With the right attention and advice men ought to be encouraged to play with their prize organ, even when they don’t feel like it.  This is the sure way to learning that intimacy and pleasure might be different after a prostate cancer diagnosis, but they don’t have to be over’

Q&A: How do I have a prostate orgasm?

Q&A: How do I have a prostate orgasm?


I know you’re female focused but I thought you might be able to help me. I’m interested in ‘exploring’ if that’s the right word, my prostate. It’s not something I’ve done before but the idea is growing on my I guess. I’d just like some advice on where to start and what to expect?


Hey J!

This week is Men’s Health Week so we’re really happy to be able to answer one for the boys.

You sound a bit hesitant but it’s great that you’re looking to explore new things and prostate play can add a new dimension to your sex life. It can make your orgasms more intense and some men can orgasm from prostate stimulation alone.

The prostate is sometimes compared to the male G-Spot and it does have quite a lot in common with the G-Spot. Like the G-Spot it swells and hardens as you become aroused which makes it easier to find.

It can be stimulated by inserting a finger or toy two or three inches inside the anus, it’s important to go slowly, use lots of lube and stop and warm up some more if you feel any pain. You should also try using a specialist anal lubricant which will be thicker and longer lasting than regular lube.

You should make sure you are already aroused before going for the prostate, and again, if it hurts you’re doing it wrong. Add more stimulation and lubrication.

It might take quite a lot of time and stimulation (and a lot of lube, remember the anus isn’t self lubricating) to get you there so be patient.

Here’s a handy guide to show you where to find your prostate:

His Prostate


It might be a good idea to try a specially designed prostate toys such as Rocks-Off Naughty Boy Prostate Massager. Which is slim, almost silent and perfect for beginners, it also stimulates your perineum for even more pleasure. If you’re playing with a partner you might want to try using latex gloves or finger guards, they can prevent nails from snagging and help if you’re worried about cleanliness.

Rocks Off Prostate Massager

If you’d like to find our more you might want to look at the Ultimate Guide to Prostate Pleasure, which is a veritable compendium of useful information.

If you have any questions please send them to, if you’d like advice from our sex and relationship expert Sarah Berry please include the subject line ‘Ask Sarah’.

Best Wishes,

Team Sh! xx

All names have been changed for the purposes of anonymity.


Men’s Shopping Event at Sh! | Mon 21st Dec | 6-8pm | FREE!

Guys, we know how stressful Christmas shopping for your bae can be: you have to get the right style, the right size, the right colour – and then you have to wrap it all up too…

Let us take the stress out of Christmas shopping for her this year – Join us for an in-store shopping event for men, on Monday 21st December, 6-8pm.

Our ever-helpful sales advisers will be on hand to help pick out the perfect gift for your partner, and wrap it too!

There will be mulled wine, mince pies and an easy, unpressured atmosphere of Christmas cheer in which to browse fabulous gifts that are all about her pleasure…

Sh! is THE place to buy a sensual present  for your lover, partner, girlfriend or wife.

Men's Shopping Event

We have insider knowledge, like no other, when it comes to sex toy shopping – 23 years of speaking to women of all ages and preferences about what they want has taught us everything you need to know!

Before you set off, take a moment to think about the points below:

What are you thinking of buying? A luxury vibrator? A stylish strap-on or perhaps a sparkly butt plug?

All of these are great ideas – if it is what she’s into…

With gifts, it’s best to play it safe and choose something that she has had her eye on for a while…

She’ll love that you’ve paid attention AND she’ll want to use it time and time again. Win!
Lelo Lily


We have some stunning gift vibrators in store, beautifully packaged, which make  fabulous Christmas additions to her toy box.




A word to the wise – we’d never recommend these go under the tree, ready to unwrap at the family gathering!

Sexy gifts, however beautiful, are best presented between just the two of you – perhaps on Christmas Eve, when you’re both feeling magical, rather than Christmas Day, when the feeling maybe more frazzled!


Multi-Strap Knickers

Beautiful lingerie is sexy – just make sure to choose something she’ll want to wear!

If you are thinking of sensual smalls, do a little homework, before you visit…

  • Style Does she prefer thongs, Brazilian cut panties of full-bottomed briefs?
  • Colour What colours does she wear the most? By choosing lingerie in her favourite colour, you’re guaranteed to be seeing her in your gift time and time again…
  • Size Tricky one, but you don’t want to get it wrong (trust us on this one). Take a sneaky peek in her undies drawer and make a note of her sizes.




Shopping for the perfect gift for the women in your life is not easy, we know, and that’s probably why so many guys leave it to the very last minute! So, on the last week of Christmas, we’d be delighted you join us and let us help!

Where:  Sh!, 57 Hoxton Square, London N1 6PB

When:  Monday 21st December, 6-8pm