A guide to seduction and erotic play

As too many films and depictions of how sex ought to be would lead us to believe, no sexual encounter is complete without an erect body part going into an orifice. (Bah!)

Foreplay, touching, and teasing is all good and well, but it’s the penetration that matters, right?

Wrong, wrong, wrong.

There are so many ways that you and your partner can play together without any kind of penetration.

Whether you are in a committed relationship or are just keen to spice up your frequent and varied sex life, find out how you can seduce and be seduced without slipping a D into the V (or B).

Don’t forget to touch

With busy schedules and working lives to contend with, many of us rush sexy-time and forget about the fundamental act that is taking place. Any type of intimate scenario is all about two bodies coming together and enjoying one another, so why the rush? Let’s slow it down a bit…

Instead of having humpin’, bumpin’ sex, go back to basics and learn just how erotic touch can be. Using your mouth, start at the top and work your way down. If you want to add even more sizzle, try placing an ice cube in your mouth. This will increase sensation for your partner and ensure that they tune in and turn on.

Try massage

Massaging is a really intimate act because it involves one person paying close attention to another’s body. Include some of this Sensuous Massage Oil into the mix and you’ve got yourself a truly tantalising experience.

Before you get started, why not set the mood with the use of candles and music? It might also be a good idea to ask your partner where they’d most like to be massaged, as you don’t want to end up touching them somewhere that they’re not comfortable with.

The power of words

It’s amazing how much sexy talking is overlooked in the bedroom, especially given the fact that for many of us, it’s a massive turn on. It is also a great way to find out more about your partner and what they like.

Try laying down on the bed next to each other, but don’t touch. Instead, simply talk about what you would like to happen the next time you play. You could even reminisce about past sexual experiences that you’ve shared. Either way, talking about sex is a sure fire way to get both of your hearts racing!


Lelo Feather Review

How to do Sensual Erotic Massage

The skin is the body’s largest erogenous zone  with millions of sensory receptors,  all of which deliver amazing pleasure especially when your skin is overloaded with sensations.

Skin is  receptive to a whole range of erotic touches from fingertip light to full-on sensation.

There are extra sensitive receptors in genitals and nipples, but just diving straight for the usual erotic zones misses out large areas of our bodies that are receptive the sensual pleasure of erotic touch – feet, shoulders, neck, inner thighs – anywhere you care to name! 

Prepping for Sensual Massage

Massage, erotic or otherwise, is not something to be rushed; it’s important to ensure you are both comfortable.

  • Prepare the area – gather towels, cushions, omassage oils, lubricants and any toys you may want to hand, as once started it’s a real mood-killer to rush off and start rummaging in drawers.
  • Dim the lights or better still, light candles. Creating a sensual, relaxing  environment  is key.
  • You’ll need full access to their body so lay them down diagonally on the bed or on cushions on the floor.
  • Only warm bodies can bask in the erotic glow of massage so take a hot bath, light a fire/crank up the heat before stripping off.
  • Turn phones off


On to the Massage…

  • It can be incredibly sexy for your lover to be totally nude for an erotic massage…
  • But exposing only the area about to be massaged, just like a professional masseuse, is also hot – the effect of air on skin can really ignite the senses and flashing certain small areas can feel vulnerably naughty, especially when you get to the “erotic” bits!
  • massage candle
    Massage Candle £12

    Candles for massages are a great way to deliver warm  oil directly to your lover’s body.

    Massage candles are not like household candles as they burn at a much  lower temperature. It’s recommended that you blow out the candle and wait a few minutes before dripping the oil or test the temperature on your own skin first.

  • Once you start massaging, don’t break contact between your skin and theirs – it’s this continuous rhythm allows your lover to really relish in the erotic sensations.
  • Don’t rush! An sensual massage is not something to do speedily.  Set aside at least an hour for your massage session and try not to get to the main dish (the erotic portion of the massage) until half an hour in.
  • Start with your lover lying on the their front so you can work on their back, starting at their shoulders and working your way down to their feet.
  • In this position the erotic hot spot is the bum and what access you can get to between their legs.
  • Turn them over and start again at their shoulders, working down to their feet, by way of breasts, and then onto the pubic area.
  • Whether you are massaging bum or balls, legs or labia, go slowly and repeat each stroke 10 times: use fluid, continuous and circular strokes.
Lush Silicone Lube £10
Lush Silicone Lube £10
  • For intimate areas use silicone-based lubricant, rather than (potentially irritating ) massage oil. Silicone lubricant has the oily-feel, staying power that’s necessary for massage and it’s safe to use with condoms, should your massage turn into sex.
Cordless Wand
Cordless Wand £50
  • Vibration relaxes muscles, so a wand massager is great for erotic massage. Massagers can be used externally all over the body to stimulate the senses – they offer powerful vibration so keep a towel handy in case you need to ‘dampen down’ the buzz on genital areas…
  • Pay close attention to your lover. In sensual massage, the stiffening of the body can mean that the massage is too hard or that they’re close to orgasm. The same goes for a moan – it’s your job as the erotic masseur/se to know the difference!









Introducing the Extase Lubricant range…

The Sh! girlz are gearing up for Valentines already, and our latest products are specially thrilling! The Extase range make great pressies to spice up your sex life…

Massage oild to warm things up!
Extase Strawberry Hot Massage Oil

Extase Natural Lubricant is a smooth, silky water-based lube for all sorts of fun…neutral and sensual, it’s a lovely all-round lube.

Extase Warming Massage Oil – a strawberry-scented hot massage oil that warms on contact and gives off a sensuous heat when it’s breathed on…
We’re specially struck with the warming effects of this one…the Sh! girlz found that testing this on the backs of our hands was very heating, so we reckon it would be really thrilling on extra sensitive areas…

Extase Chocolate Orange Lubricant – who says chocolate orange is just for Christmas? This is a yummy flavoured lube, great for massaging onto your lover’s sensitive zones and licking off!

Four luxurious lubes from Extase
Extase Coffret Sexy Gift Set

Extase Plaisir Pour Elle – a minty tingling cool lube, designed to enhance pleasure for her! Presented in a stylish tin, it makes a lovely present for a special lady!

Extase Coffret Sexy Gift Set – A sexy gift set of four Extase lubes, presented in a deluxe tin – the perfect present! Contains:

– Extase Plaisir Pour Elle, a minty tingling stimulating gel for thrilling sensations…
– Extase Strawberry Lubricant – ultrasilky smooth lube with a yummy strawberry flavour!
– Extase Blackberry Massage Oil – sensuous scented oil for a smooth massage…
– Extase Hot Massage Oil – warming strawberry-scented oil to turn up the heat!

Check out our other fabulous new goodies on our Sexy Valentines page, and watch this space for the Sh! Girlz’ Valentines Gift Guide – coming soon!

New Lubes and Lotions

Lelo‘s lovely new Massage Oils are in stock at Sh! HQ now.

Lelo Luxury Massage Oil

Lelo Luxury Massage Oils – in Spicy Clove & Amber and Bergamot & Balsam Fir – are deliciously scented, luxurious massage oils for sensual play! They’re also enriched with tiny flakes of gold to lend a gorgeous sheen to your lover’s skin.

Lelo have also sent us their lovely new Personal Lubricant – a rich, water-based lube that moisturizes and provides condom-safe lubrication during play.

Presented in gorgeous perfume-style bottles, Lelo Massage Oils and Lelo Personal Lubricant are wonderfully discreet and ideal for a special present.

Watch this space for more gorgeous new goodies coming up this week!