Q&A: What sex toy should I buy my wife?

Hi, my wife’s birthday is soon and I’m thinking of buying her some new toy (for both of us to enjoy). I’ve seen porn where people are using  wand massagers and I have read that they are the best toy to stimulate the clitoris, which is the only way my wife cums. However, I am a bit worried it might be too intense? It’s a lot of money to spend on a toy and I want to be sure it’s the right thing. Will she like it? It’s not like I can take it back if she doesn’t. 



Hi Chris

Many thanks for your email.

Wand vibratorsMost Popular Wand Massagers are hugely popular and many sexuality educators, like Betty Dodson, swear by them.

Their deep, throbby vibrations are very reliable for pleasure, and as Wands were originally designed for all-over body massaging, they have many uses.

It’s impossible for us to guarantee that your wife (or any woman) will love the vibrator you buy for her. We can guarantee that the cherry-picked sex toys we sell are toys that deliver pleasure to thousands of women, but as each woman is individual and unique, we simply cannot guarantee every toy will work for every woman.

Fun sex is all about discovering what’s enjoyably and pleasurable for you and your partner, and a Wand can certainly help with this.

Wand massagers come in an array of colours and sizes, there are plug&play versions, there are cordless ones, and there are smaller-sized ones for travelling and ease of use.

Wand massagers are very intense, and this is why they are so popular.

To start off with, we recommend using the vibrator on the area around the vulva, so not directly on it. Placing a Wand vibrator on the lower part of the stomach can be incredibly sexy – the rumbly vibrations can be felt into the knicker-area. Or, place a small pillow between the clit and the Wand; the whole pillow vibrates!

It may be an idea to find out what type of vibrator your wife might like; it could be that she dreams of a Wand, or perhaps she’d prefer a smaller-size clit vibe… It can be tricky to buy a vibrator for someone else, which is why getting Sh! Gift Vouchers is such a great idea – that way you’re sure to get her something she’ll enjoy!

If you have any other questions please contact us at advice@sh-womenstore, include the subject line ‘Ask Sarah’ if you’d like your advice from our new sex and relationship expert.

All names have been changed for the purposes of anonymity.

Good luck!

Team Sh! xx

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