Q&A: Get that ocean back in motion – how to combat vaginal dryness


I am in my mid-50s, out of a sexual relationship for over 5 years, and experiencing serious vaginal dryness (PAP smear exams are excruciating.) I am also a sex toy newbie, so I would appreciate advice on what vibrator to use. I don’t have any issues with orgasm — very easy — but I have read that vaginal stimulation/penetration will keep things alive. Your recommendations are welcome!
Many thanks,


Hello there,

Thanks for getting in touch! This question is very common and we’ll share our best tips for moistness.

Dry and brittle vaginal membranes are most often associated with the menopause, but dryness can affect women of any age for a multitude of reasons. Common causes are levels of estrogen dropping following menstruation or childbirth, certain medications and bacterial imbalance in your once lush lady parts.

Vaginal dryness at any age is simply no fun, especially when it comes to being intimate. It might feel that your body is shutting up shop without your permission, but there are a few things that you can do to help things along and combat vaginal dryness.



Who doesn’t love a warm bath or steamy shower for two before some hot lovin’? Of course, we all want to be squeaky clean, but bathing just before getting intimate can dry out the vagina and remove any moisture before we’ve even started. Aim to get soapy an hour or two before, as this gives your body time to restore lost moisture to your pleasure palace.

Ditch that Douche!

For some bizarre reason, vaginal douches have made their way over the water from the States and are becoming more popular with women here in the UK. They promise unrivaled cleanliness and vaginal health, but in reality, offer anything but…

Douches can seriously mess around with the delicate bacterial makeup of your lady parts and lead to inflammation and dryness – so send that douche to the bin!


Moisturise, Moisturise, Moisturise

We have been slightly skeptical about ‘vaginal moisturisers’ but this all changed when we came across YES Vaginal Moisturiser, an organic and hypo-allergenic gel that works to alleviate dryness and atrophy.
A 5ml application of the iso-topic formula to the delicate inner tissue typically provides a moist, comfortable vagina for up to 3 days – it cleverly releases moisture as and when the vagina needs it.
The gel is completely without fragrance, colour, taste or residue, and contains no parabens, hormones, glycerine or known skin irritants.

Sensual Massage

The more aroused you are, the more likely your body is to respond with silky smooth natural lubricant.

Sensual massage is a great way of stimulating your erogenous zones and helps to form a closer bond with your partner. Opting for a high-quality massage oil will certainly start to get things moving in the right direction! We love the Orgie Sensual Massage Oil which is packed with high-quality ingredients and gorgeous essential oils like Sweet Almond Oil, Grape Seed Oil, Sunflower Oil, and Argan Oil.

A word of warning here: Oil-based products aren’t suitable as vaginal lubricants, so however sensual and sweet-smelling the massage oil is, keep it away from your sensitive foof.

Oil-based products have a terrible habit of clinging to the walls of the vagina, where they trap and harbor bacteria. The bacteria grows, of course, and before you know it, you have an unpleasant itch in your ditch…


Love that Lube!

Lube should be your number one weapon against vaginal dryness, but it’s essential that you choose the right one. Steer clear of flavoured or heavily scented lubes that can upset your vagina and cause itchiness; choose a water-based, paraben-free lube instead.

The lube we recommend for very dry membranes is Sh! Pure Plus, a viscous water-based lube without parabens. As this lube is extra thick, it creates a lovely “padded” layer between the delicate membranes and the finger/penis/toy pleasuring it, minimising the risk of abrasions.

Use It or Lose It

The old saying couldn’t be truer in this case – keeping the vaginal juices flowing makes for a happy & healthy vagina.

Arousal and orgasm are excellent ways of keeping a steady flow of blood to the genital area and by using internal toys, you’ll keep the stretchiness of the vaginal canal in good shape too.

At the Sh! shop in East London, we measure sex toys for internal use in ‘fingers’, i.e “how many fingers feel just right?” This will help gauge which size toy would work best for you, in terms of girth.


We’d recommend starting off with a size you know you are comfortable with; choosing a slightly smaller size is more helpful than choosing a girthier toy that could end up being painful to use. Over time, you could introduce a bigger toy if you find yourself lusting for more.

Top 3 Small-Size Internal Vibrators

Remember to add a generous amount of lube to your toy as well as your vagina before insertion – this will make play so much more comfortable.

We hope these tips will help bring back both moisture and comfort! 


Team Sh! xx





2 thoughts on “Q&A: Get that ocean back in motion – how to combat vaginal dryness

  • 12/02/2019 at 19:02

    Hello Sh! Family!,
    Great advice here. I’d add that perimenopausal and menopausal womenfolk may wish to discuss Estradiol vaginal inserts with their GP. These are TINY tablets of estrogen you can easily and painlessly insert in your vagina, with a super-skinny applicator (the size of a cheap pen). YMMV, but they worked BRILLIANTLY for me in restoring my natural flora and lush juiciness. (They also drastically cut down my estrogen-related UTIs, which is how I discovered them.) We absolutely do not need to suffer in silence as previous gens of vagina-owners (and their partners) did. Please don’t be shy about calmly discussing what would work best for you with your doctor. (And if your doc ain’t a sympathetic supporter of your consenting adult sex life, at whatever age, then you need and deserve a new doc! )

    • 20/02/2019 at 16:33


      Thank you so much for your message; we’re sure many peeps will look into the tablets (count us in!) xx


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