During the process of writing this post we have researched as much as possible about the topic to give a constructive and informed opinion. What we have found is that the little scientific research that has been conducted on female ejaculation is highly contradictory and really inconclusive. Scientists keep arguing, speculating or drawing conclusions based on extremely small case studies (i.e. the French study on female ejaculation is based on the experiences of only 7 women!).
We are not scientists and whilst there are truly still many ‘myths’ left to solve, here’s what we can gather.
Firstly, let’s clear the air.
Squirting is NOT a must. Porn has created a culture of unrealistic gushing and moaning; of women screaming to the top of their lungs and squirting bucketfuls to their heart’s content.
Life disclosure: You can have amazing, mind-blowing sex, not squirt and it will still be amazing, mind-blowing sex. Multi and blended orgasms, BDSM, bum-fun, sexy massages, toys of all shapes and sizes or just good ol’ loving sex are just some of the things you can do to widen your sex experiences and sexuality. Squirting is fantastic because it comes with G-Spot orgasms, releasing more or less fluid is actually just a side-effect!
So before we enter the slippery slope of squirting – breathe and take that stress off your and/or your partner’s shoulders.
So, what is Squirting?
Squirting is the release of fluid coming out of the urethra during orgasm. The quantities may vary from person to person and there is no wrong answer to how much fluid one must release to be considered squirting.
What is this magical fluid you may ask? Well, here’s where it get’s tricky and where there is no definite answer. *cough…sexism…cough*
The ‘main ingredients’ seem to vary between these two:
1. Alkaline liquid from the Skene’s glands (which is the female equivalent of the prostate) made of similar components of those produced by the male prostate, along with glucose and fructose.
2. Traces of urine
The quantity of how much of these two are in this fluid has rattled many cages and it is still inconclusive *cough…sexism…cough*. But honestly…so what if it is made of urine? Understand that whatever it is made of, it is a natural way of the body to respond to stimulation. So as long as you are having safe, consensual sex… just enjoy it! If you are having trouble with your partner due to embarrassment, this is the time to reclaim that empowerment.
Sex is messy and fun and that is just fine! 😀
Then… what is that other fluid I release when I have sex? Is that Squirting?
Those of us with female reproductive organs release many-a-fluids when playing with ourselves, a fun-buddy or partner. One of them is natural lubrication when aroused – the more arousal, the more lubrication. So if you feel you are releasing a lot of fluids, odds are your body is just having tons of fun lubricating itself. You can however feel very aroused and not lubricate – that’s also fine!
There are all kinds of lubes to help, we recommend our water-based lube, odourless and tasteless it is a perfect gal pal if you want some extra lubrication.
Will I be ever able to squirt?
There is no one secret way of making someone squirt. We all have different bodies that may require different attention. And, as always, your mental state (whether just had a bad day and are very stressed or very relaxed) also plays a big part in your sexual experience.
There is also a lot of debate on whether all or only some women can squirt: so if squirting is like riding a bicycle or being able to touch your nose with your tongue. And again, many may debates and no real conclusion (*cough…you-know-how-it-goes…cough*), but if you want to know whether you can squirt there is only one way to figure it out – and it’s loads of fun.
How to squirt
With that in mind, there is a correlation between the G-Spot and squirting. The G-Spot is located close to the entrance of the vagina, about half a finger in and up on the front wall. Have a feel with a lubed-up finger – the ridged area is the G-spot. Some are harder to locate than others, so if you don’t find yours in a jiff don’t stress, it might take some exploring. The G-Spot also swells when you are aroused, so that might also be a good time to try and find it, this time it will feel like a spongy lump. Found it? Smashing!
The G-Spot needs a lot of stimulation, and exercising your PC muscle or “kegels” will help in sensitising your G-Spot and having stronger penetrative orgasms.
Here’s when the love balls come in (pun intended). These are small body-safe and usually silicon-made balls to insert into your vagina. They are made to be easily inserted and removed, so not to worry about ‘losing them’. Try stopping your pee half way when you are urinating: that “pulling up” movement is done by your PC muscle.
Sh! love balls are hypoallergenic and contain no latex or phthalates, they are non-porous and super easy to clean, but the Fun Factory Smartballs Uno or Duo Geisha Love Balls also have 5 star reviews from customers, so take your pick 😉 One you have them inside you just repeat that “pulling up” movement. You can start slow trying it out a few times and raise the number of “pulling up” movement as you progress.
Now, to the G-Spot. Reaching to it can be tricky if you are alone, in which case using a sex toy is helpful. For first timers, the Rocks-Off Rock Chick Mini vibe is affordable, powerful and it doesn’t forget about the wondrous clit! Once you’ve located it, regardless if you’re using a sex toy or fingers a classic tip is to try a “come hither” motion.
Try it by yourself or a partner and whatever happens, relax and enjoy a wet Valentine’s 😀