Lost Sexual desire

Lost sexual desire may simply be because have found that the “sparkle” has ebbed from a long relationship or we are just too stressed from a hard day’s work to raise an erotic thought. Or lost sexual desire could be more physical: As we get older we become less flexible, our bodies change and it can become increasingly difficult to “get wet”. Removal of ovaries in hysterectomy will lead to a massive drop in testosterone levels and therefore drop in libido and lost sexual desire. The menopause similarly alters our hormonal make-up and we may find that where we were awash in sexual desire, we no longer have the same sexual cravings or even lost all desire for sex. Post-surgery (for example because of gynae cancers) where there has been nerve-ending damage, women may experience a lost sensation, making it harder to become aroused, harder to get wet, sex uncomfortable etc.

Whatever the reason for finding you’d rather have a cup of tea and a kit-kat than a passionate bed-in, don't give up, accept your lost sexual desire and miss out years of enlightened love-play.

Here are a few practical tips for rekindling sexual desire:

Those with reduced sensation may simply need more stimulation to kick-start sexual desire. Try a high powered vibe such as the Ultra Vector Egg, or an external clit massager such as the Layaspot Vibrator. Using Clitoral Gel could also heighten your sensitivity. Enhancing gels contain naturally occurring amino acids that stimulate blood flow, so rubbing it onto your clit and labia will produce a pleasurable tingly feeling.

You may want to think about different areas to stimulate. If you have always been a clit girl, but would like to try something new, use a G-Spot Vibrator such as the Rock Chick Vibrator or G-Swirl G-Spot Vibrator. Take a mirror and a copy of Smart Girls Guide to the G-Spot and have a good play with yourself!

Where “getting wet” has become an issue, using a special sex-formulated lubricant such as Lush Liquid as part of any solo or partner play is a simple and VERY effective way to reduce any kind of friction - whether it's the physical slip-slide kind or more cerebral worries of “am I wet enough” or “is she turned on enough?” or “am I doing something wrong?”

For super long lasting lubrication use Silicone Lubricant. Many people really like a silicone lube's amazing oily slipperyness, but a few can find it irritates them or causes an infection. For substantial lubrication with little chance of irritation, an all natural ingredients lube such as Probe Classic Thick is a good choice.

For the vast majority, lack of sexual activity within a partnership causes stress and can lead to relationship breakdown. Where a long time has elapsed since your last sexual encounter, you may find it difficult to brooch the subject with your partner, or have trouble “getting started” again. Candlelit evenings, well placed whispers or hot baths with bubbly all go a long way to relaxing you into feeling aroused. Where you may need a little more help with expressing your desires, agreeing to play an Adult Game together can be a fun, saucy introduction back into feeling sexy and getting turned on. Decorating your loved one with Massage Oil or the more lickable Shiatsu Edible Oil can put you both in the mood. A Blindfold and Ostrich Feather are also simple bedside accoutrements to build anticipation and sensuality, as well tickle your fancy!

Lack of sexual desire is often the result of a head too full of worries and daily chores… try escaping into visual fantasy with an erotic DVD or reading a book of erotic fantasies. Many women react very positively (and wetly) to sexual imagery and fantasy and this can be a great way to kick-start long forgotten arousal.

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