Unable to orgasm when you are with your Lover? The Sh! Girlz offer advice.
Is striving to orgasm with your lover, leading you, not to the pinnacle of girly passion but down the soggy path of female frustration? If you can't cum when you are with a lover dont despair - it’s not as uncommon as you may think. It's certainly NOT abnormal.
Women have incredibly complex & individual sexual responses. Worrying about not orgasming just loops our body into a vicious circle, so the longer an orgasm doesn't arrive, the more we tense up... the more unlikely we are to cum.
Aaarrrrgggghhhhh!!! This is how come many women end up giving in and having a fake orgasm. But the Sh! Girlz are certainly not going to teach you how to fake orgasm! We understand that being in this loop is tiring, frustrating and disheartening for both of you, but faking an orgasm is never going to be the answer in the long run. Unless you take it to the grave (and so sentence yourself to a lifetime of not knowing how it feels to orgasm with a lover) a fake orgasm lie will have to come out sooner or later.
To break the "I can't orgasm" cycle, you have to do some more homework! If you can orgasm during masturbation, then that is a great starting point. Discovering how to transform ‘can't cum’ worries into ‘WILL cum’ confidence is the key to future great sex with both yourself and your lovers.
Getting really REALLY aroused is absolute key to many women's ability to orgasm. Quickies generally don't cut it. Replay a well-loved fantasy, watch a hot DVD or get inspiration from some steamy Erotica.
A good fantasy can really help to get your juices flowing! If juggling book, vibe and orgasm seems too tricky to coordinate, why not get yourself in the mood by watching an erotic DVD as this can help build ideas for fantasies as well....
Many women need pretty intense sustained stimulation of the clitoral/vulva to orgasm, but if you find that you’re taking so long to cum, that your clitoris begins to feel over-sensitive or numb, OR that your, or your lover's, hand starts to tire, OR that you are getting kinda bored even (it happens!) then a vibrator could be a launch pad to sure-fire sexual fireworks for you.
Millions of women find the 200 oscillations a minute delivered by a well-charged Vibe will get them off every time.
Nowadays adding a little extra clitoral stimulation can be as discreet as it is pleasurable: most Finger Vibes are powered by tiny watch batteries and are so small and light that they simply slip onto a fingertip to add a thrilling buzz to muff-shuffles. A discreet cock-ring vibrator like the Lurve Heart Vibe will give you both an extra thrill during penetrative sex and is small & fun-looking enough to be introduced without being threatening and may just be the difference between you having an orgasms or not!
Low profile styles like these are probably easier to include during sex with a lover without feeling as if you’ve imposed a threesome!
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